Being Aware

While vacuuming the meditation room one day, it occurred to me that I can only Be Awareness by Being Aware. At that moment my head banged into the doorjamb.

One can only Be Awareness by Being Aware. This means that if we are not being aware, if we are in thought, effectively we are not being awareness. So to say that one is always aware is simply conceptual. Mostly we are unaware.

Rather than seeing awareness as an object and using mind as the subject we should be seeing mind as an object which can only be from the space of Awareness as the Ultimate Subject.

-purushottama

This post is from a collection of essays, stories, insights and poems that have occurred to me along the Way titled Here to Now and Behind.

“Here” in This Watching

For those of us who are interested in discovering our real nature, our original face, our one true being, it is indispensable to see the distinction between thinking and watching the mind. We must see the difference between being lost in thought and witnessing the mechanism of the mind. We can see that when we are in thinking we are not “present” but when we watch the mind, without getting involved in the particulars of thought, we can feel our very own beingness. The more we recognize this distinction the more we are drawn back away from thinking and into witnessing.

We do not sit and watch the mind in order to accomplish something but because we recognize that “here” in this watching we are nearer to our self than when we are out chasing dreams.  Of course we continue to forget and find ourselves time and time again lost in space but each time we return to witnessing we are breaking the patterns of conditioning and are becoming more and more familiar with our beingness.

-purushottama

This post is from a collection of essays, stories, insights and poems that have occurred to me along the Way titled Here to Now and Behind.

Inspection Required

From where come you
My thoughts
You’re not, you are
Again you’re not

You lead me to your sons and daughters
I have known your ancestors
But on careful inspection
You disappear into silence

Come back and make a stand
But no you fold
Like a nomad’s tent
A shadow hiding

-purushottama

This post is from a collection of essays, stories, insights and poems that have occurred to me along the Way titled Here to Now and Behind.

One Step Back

When I was a kid visiting my grandparents in the summer, I used to sit out on the porch and watch the constant flow of cars passing. Sometimes I would check out the license plates to see which state they were from. When you focus on each car as it passes you catch the car in your attention and follow it until you turn your head to catch the next. But if you have no particular interest in where the cars are from you can just stay stationary and watch the flow as a whole. In this way you are not moving the head to follow each individually. It is the same with watching our thoughts. If we have some interest in the individual thoughts we follow them for a while and then snap back to catch the next. But if we are not involved with each passing thought, we can witness the movement of the mind as a whole. This way of watching is just one step back.

-purushottama

This post is from a collection of essays, stories, insights and poems that have occurred to me along the Way titled Here to Now and Behind.

Helping In

Many of us for whatever reason have some kind of inborn desire to help others, to make the world a better place.  It seems pretty clear that what we have now in our world is a result of the efforts of “mind”.  We see that “mind” can never be truly creative, can never be truly new. It is always coming from the past. All thinking is based on the past and so can never create anything that is not based on the past. It cannot create anything that is a jump into the vertical. It is always linear, horizontal.

We can see that if we truly want to “make the world a better place”, then we have to help others discover life “beyond mind”, outside of the prison of the past. And it follows that the only way we can help others discover life beyond mind is to make that discovery for ourselves. It is not enough to talk about it but we have to be transformed by it. We have to allow it to absorb every vestige of the “me” in order to make room for life in now, in creativity, and in real love.

The next question is surely how to proceed. How do we come out of the prison of the mind? How do we make that discovery of life “beyond mind?” How do we live in “now?” There may be many answers to this question. But I can only speak from my own experience of one and that is meditation. And by meditation I mean simply turning our attention onto the activity of the mind. Seeing the workings of the mind without interfering, without judging, without jumping into the duality of the mind, without getting involved in the yes-no. And it is this watching, this witnessing of the mind in its totality that liberates us from its clutches.

And the irony is that often what is keeping us from allowing that transformation in ourselves is our engaging in the activities of trying to make the world a better place. Our time may be consumed in social causes. We may be active in political movements. We may be trying to heal others. But all the while we are ignoring the one glaring fact that we have not allowed our own transformation. We have been propping up the “me” through all this activity and so are still living through the mind.

So let those of us who have been blessed or cursed with the disease of wanting to make the world a better place get down to the real work that will pay those dividends. Let us move “in” with a great earnestness, with a tremendous longing and perhaps we can actualize, we can realize that which we have been seeking, an earth populated by beings in touch with existence, an earth which is populated with whole, sensitive, creative beings who are not acting out of conditioning but out of the intelligence of the whole.

-purushottama

This post is from a collection of essays, stories, insights and poems that have occurred to me along the Way titled Here to Now and Behind.

From Becoming to Being

One of the most important milestones along the way back to our own true self is not just to have an intellectual understanding of, but to actually see, to feel, to experience, the difference between becoming and being.

Being is always here and now.

Becoming is always somewhere else, in another time.

And the way to discover Being is by watching becoming. Being is the vantage point from which one witnesses becoming.

-purushottama

This post is from a collection of essays, stories, insights and poems that have occurred to me along the Way titled Here to Now and Behind.

Here Osho speaks more fully on becoming and Being here.

In Meditation

We sense the body not to become more relaxed, though that is a by-product. We sense the body to become aware of the one who knows the sensing.

We follow the breath not to come into stillness although that too is a by-product. No, we follow the breath to come to know the one to which everything appears.

And we witness the mind, the thoughts, not to become more silent but to come to be silence itself.

We witness all that we are not and thus, be, knowingly that which we are. We sense the body, follow the breath and witness the mind to become aware of our own true nature not as an object to be seen but as the ultimate subjectivity.

-purushottama

This post is from a collection of essays, stories, insights and poems that have occurred to me along the Way titled Here to Now and Behind.