A great master was asked, what is the Buddha? “Mind is the Buddha,” he answered. When after many years he was asked the same question again by the same disciple, he said, “No Buddha, no mind.”
“Then why did you say before, ‘Mind is the Buddha’?”
“To stop the baby crying! Once the baby stops crying, I say, ‘No mind, no Buddha!’”
Philosophy is just a toy, a toy to stop the baby crying, and so is theology.
Religion really consists of experience, experimentation; it has nothing to do with speculation. In its essential nature it is the science of the inner; it is as scientific as any other science. The difference between religion and science is not of their methodology but only of their object. Science looks at the objective world where our energy is flowing, where our light is flowing. Religion searches into the subjective where our light is not flowing but can be turned to flow. Hence science is easier than religion. Never for a single moment think that religion is simpler than science. It is a higher science, how can it be simpler than science? It is a superior science.
First the light has to flow inward, then it falls on your being, and then your being is revealed and you can enter into your being. And to enter into one’s own being is to enter into the kingdom of God. There, you are not and God is: you exist only in the shadow. When the light flows outward you exist – but only in the shadow. You exist because you remain unaware of your real self. Your real self is the supreme self. Your real self is a “Self” with a capital S. It has nothing to do with you, it is the self of all. But for that, a great transformation has to take place.
Nature has prepared you for the outward flow. Nature’s function is finished. With man, nature has reached to its climax, now nothing else is going to happen naturally unless man makes a decision to go further than nature. Nature has brought you to the point where you are capable of standing on your own. Man is no longer a child, man has become adult. Now nature will no longer parent you; there is no need.
Natural evolution has stopped at man. This is a fact. Even scientists are becoming more and more aware of it: that for thousands of years nothing has happened to man, man has remained the same – as if nature’s work is done. Now man has to take the course of further growth into his own hands.
That’s what religion is.
Religion means: man starts standing on his own feet, becomes responsible for his own being, starts looking and searching and inquiring into what is the case – Who am I? And this should not only be curiosity.
Philosophy is out of curiosity. Religion is a very sincere, authentic search; it is inquiry. And there is a great difference between curiosity and inquiry. Curiosity is childish, just a little itching in the head. You would like to scratch and then you feel satisfied. Philosophy is that scratching; religion is a life-and-death matter. In philosophy you never become involved, you remain aloof. You play with the toys, but it is not a question of life and death. You accumulate knowledge, but you never practice it. […]
Religion is not a question of knowing but of living up to it. Religion is life, and unless you live it, you will not know anything about what it is. And to live religion one has to drop all philosophizing and one has to start experimenting. One has to become a lab. The scientist’s lab is outside; the religious person’s lab is his own being – his own body, his own soul, his own mind. The scientist has to concentrate on the object on which he is experimenting, his work has to be done with open eyes.
The work of religion has to be done with closed eyes; one has to concentrate upon oneself.
And the complexity is great because in the world of religion the experimenter and the experimented upon are the same. Hence the complexity, hence the strangeness, hence the incomprehensibility, hence the illogicality. The knower and the known are the same in the world of religion. In the world of science the knower is separate, the known is separate; things are clear-cut, demarcated. But in religion everything merges, melts into everything else – even the knower cannot remain separate.
Religion does not give you knowledge separate from the knower, it does not give you experience separate from the knower but as the very essence of the knower.
To be a religious seeker one has to drop all philosophizing. One has to drop all a priori knowledge because all a priori knowledge is a hindrance; it stops your inquiry. Inquiry becomes dishonest – from the very beginning it becomes poisoned. How can you inquire if you have already concluded?
To be a Christian and to be religious is impossible, or to be a Hindu and to be religious is impossible.
How can you be religious if you are a Hindu? Being a Hindu means that you have already concluded, you have decided what truth is. Now what is the point of inquiry? What are you going to inquire into?
All that you will be doing is finding support, arguments, for what you have already concluded. And your conclusion may be wrong – nobody knows – because your conclusion is not yours, it has been handed to you by the society.
Society is very interested in giving you conclusions, society is not interested in giving you consciousness so that you can conclude on your own. Before you become conscious, before any inquiry starts, society stuffs you with all kinds of conclusions to stop the inquiry because the inquirer is dangerous to society. The non-inquirer is convenient; the non-inquirer is obedient. He simply takes the orders, the commands, and follows them. He is conformist, he is conventional.
Once you have stuffed somebody’s mind a bit with a belief, you have drugged him. Belief is a drug. He starts believing, he goes on believing. Slowly, slowly he starts thinking that his belief is his experience.
Belief is a system of hypnosis. You go on suggesting to the child, “You are a Hindu, you are a Hindu,” you take him to the temple, you lead him through religious, so-called religious, rituals, ceremonies, and by and by he becomes conditioned to the idea that he is a Hindu, that all that is Hindu is right and all that is non-Hindu is wrong.
And the same is being done in every kind of society. You have drugged the child. His very source of consciousness has been poisoned. And if you believe something, it starts appearing to be true. If you start believing something, you will find all kinds of supports for it, all kinds of arguments to help it. Your ego becomes involved. It is not only a question of truth, deep down it is the question, “Who is right, me or you? How can I be wrong – I have to be right.” So you choose all that supports you; and life is so complex, you can find all kinds of things in life – whatsoever you choose, whatsoever you decide. If you are a pessimist, you will find all kinds of arguments in life which support pessimism. If you are an optimist, there are all kinds of arguments available to you.
Life is dual, life is paradoxical, life is multi-dimensional. Hence so many kinds of philosophies, “isms,” theologies exist in the world. And every theology lives confined by its own conclusions and feels perfectly right.
It is only in this age that the believers are finding a little difficulty. And this is a great blessing because they have become aware of other believers too. Now the Hindu is not so complacent, he cannot be; he knows that there are Christians. And the Christian cannot go on believing that he has the sole copyright for truth because he knows that there is the Mohammedan, and there is the Taoist, and there is the Buddhist. And who knows? This age is very confused – it has never been so before.
But remember, this confusion is a great blessing; something is on the way, something tremendously important is going to happen. This chaos in the mind is the beginning of a new dawn. In the future people will not be Mohammedans and Hindus and Buddhists, people will be inquirers. Belief is disappearing and the darkness of belief is disappearing. Nobody in the future is going to believe.
People will inquire, and when they find, they will trust. Belief is borrowed; trust is one’s own experience.
What I am teaching you here is that kind of religion which is going to happen more and more in the future. I am bringing the future to you in the present. I am making you pure inquirers, with no belief system, ready to go into experimentation but with no conclusion, open and ready to accept the truth whatsoever it may be – but ready only to accept the truth. […]
So the first thing to understand with The Secret of the Golden Flower is: not to be philosophic, not to be drugged by society, not to believe and not to disbelieve either. Remember, whenever I say, “Don’t believe,” I am not saying that you should disbelieve – disbelief is another kind of belief, a negative kind – when I say, “Don’t believe,” I am saying both belief and disbelief have to be dropped. You have to be simply open, with no conclusion. You have to be simply aware of your ignorance, with no knowledge hiding your ignorance. You have to be innocent, innocently ignorant, you have to say, “I don’t know.”
All right approaches begin with this “I don’t know.” If you “know” anything already without knowing, if you are knowledgeable, then that very belief will hinder, that very belief will create experiences which are not true. And when you are drugged by a belief – and belief is like LSD or marijuana or hashish – when you are drugged by a belief, it creates its own projected world, it gives your imagination free play. […]
And that’s what happens when you take LSD or marijuana or other kinds of drugs. It creates a small fantasy world in you, very colorful – at least it looks colorful when you are lost in the drug. And when you are in the drug, all that you experience appears to be ultimate truth. […] It is not. It has nothing to do with truth.
Truth is available only to those who are completely undrugged – not only chemically, but religiously too – who are completely undrugged. Only they have the capacity to know the truth. […]
That is the vision of Tao: inquire, experiment, and wait for the conclusion to come on its own.
The sutras.
Master Lu-tsu said: When the light is made to move in a circle, all the energies of heaven and earth, of the light and the dark, are crystalized.
Your consciousness is flowing outward – this is a fact; there is nothing to believe in it. When you look at an object, your consciousness flows toward the object. For example, you are looking at me. Then you forget yourself, you become focused on me. Then your energy flows toward me, then your eyes are arrowed toward me. This is extroversion. You see a flower and you are enchanted, and you become focused on the flower. You become oblivious of yourself; you are only attentive to the beauty of the flower.
This we know – every moment it is happening. A beautiful woman passes by and suddenly your energy starts following her. We know this outward flow of light. This is only half of the story. But each time the light flows out, you fall into the background, you become oblivious of yourself.
The light has to flow back so that you are both the subject and the object at the same time, simultaneously, so that you see yourself. Then self-knowledge is released. Ordinarily, we live only in this half way – half-alive, half-dead, that’s the situation. And slowly, slowly light goes on flowing outward and never returns. You become more and more empty inside, hollow. You become a black hole.
This is exactly what happens on a greater scale in the universe. Physicists have now discovered black holes. Taoists discovered black holes long before, but they were not concerned about the black holes there in the faraway space, they were concerned about the black holes inside you. A black hole is a state when all your energy is spent, exhausted, and you have become empty and you have forgotten completely how to go on nourishing this source of energy. Scientists say that sooner or later this sun will become a black hole because continuous energy is being released but nothing is returning to it. It is an immense source of energy. For millions of years it has been giving light to the solar system. For millions of years trees have been growing, flowers flowering, man living, animals moving, birds flying because of the sun’s energy. But the sun is becoming spent. Slowly, slowly, one day it will collapse; there will be no more energy left. Suddenly all light will disappear, the last rays will disappear from it. Then it will be a black hole.
And that’s how many people live their life: they become black holes because of this constant extroversion. You see this, you see that, you are continuously seeing without ever returning the energy to the seer. In the day you see the world, in the night you see dreams, but you go on remaining constantly attached to objects. This is dissipating energy.
By the time a man is thirty he is almost finished; then he is a black hole. People die nearabout thirty, although they are buried nearabout seventy – that is another matter – but they die nearabout thirty.
And I see a grain of truth in the hippie idea: don’t believe a man above thirty. There is a grain of truth in it because it is very rare to find a man beyond thirty who is alive. People become black holes, spent, utterly exhausted. They go on dragging somehow; they live without being alive, as if just the momentum of the past helps them to remain alive.
It happens: if you love bicycling, you have to pedal the bicycle. But sometimes you can just stop pedaling and, out of the momentum created by the past pedaling, the bicycle goes on for a while without pedaling. And if it is a downward slope, it can go far. And after thirty or thirty-five it is a downward slope. Thirty-five is the peak; if seventy is the average age, then thirty-five is the peak. After thirty-five you are on a downward slope; you can go on rolling down without any energy.
The Taoist experience is that this energy that you spend in your extroversion can be more and more crystallized rather than spent if you learn the secret science of turning it backward. It is possible; that is the whole science of all methods of concentration.
Just standing before a mirror someday, try one small experiment. You are looking at the mirror, your own face in the mirror, your own eyes in the mirror. This is extroversion: you are looking into the mirrored face – your own face, of course, but it is an object outside you. Then, for a moment, reverse the whole process. Start feeling that you are being looked at by the reflection in the mirror – not that you are looking at the reflection but the reflection is looking at you – and you will be in a very strange space. Just try it for a few minutes and you will be very alive, and something of immense power will start entering you. You may even become frightened because you have never known it; you have never seen the complete circle of energy.
And although it is not mentioned in Taoist scriptures this seems to me the most simple experiment anybody can do, and very easily. Just standing before the mirror in your bathroom, first look into the reflection: you are looking and the reflection is the object. Then change the whole situation, reverse the process. Start feeling that you are the reflection and the reflection is looking at you. And immediately you will see a change happening, a great energy moving toward you. In the beginning it may be frightening because you have never done it and you have never known it; it will look crazy.
You may feel shaken, a trembling may arise in you, or you may feel disorientated because your whole orientation up to now has been extroversion. Introversion has to be learned slowly, slowly. But the circle is complete. And if you do it for a few days you will be surprised how much more alive you feel the whole day. Just a few minutes standing before the mirror and letting the energy come back to you so the circle is complete . . . And whenever the circle is complete there is a great silence.
The incomplete circle creates restlessness. When the circle is complete it creates rest, it makes you centered. And to be centered is to be powerful – the power is yours. And this is just an experiment; then you can try it in many ways.
Looking at the rose flower, first look at the rose flower for a few moments, a few minutes, and then start the reverse process: the rose flower is looking at you. And you will be surprised how much energy the rose flower can give to you. And the same can be done with trees and the stars and with people. And the best way is to do it with the woman or man you love. Just look into each other’s eyes. First begin looking at the other and then start feeling the other returning the energy to you; the gift is coming back. You will feel replenished, you will feel showered, bathed, basked in a new kind of energy. You will come out of it rejuvenated, vitalized.
Master Lu-tsu said: When the light is made to move in a circle . . .
This is what they mean by moving light in a circle. Your light is moving in an arc; it simply goes out and never comes back. You become a black hole sooner or later. If the circle is complete, you will become a white hole. Now, after black holes, physics is discovering white holes too. A white hole is very pregnant with energy just the opposite of the black hole.
When the light is made to move in a circle, all the energies of heaven and earth . . .
Heaven and Earth mean inner and outer, above and below, God and the world, the invisible and the visible, the unknowable and the knowable. Heaven represents God and the Earth represents the manifested world. They become one when the circle is complete. Then you are not only dust to dust; something of the sky has penetrated you. Then you are no longer just earthly, no more just a human being; you have become divine.
Remember the root of the word “human”: it comes from “humus,” humus means the earth. Man is made of the earth, that’s why man is called human. Man is dust; hence he is called human. When the dust starts becoming luminous with the divine, then you know the splendors of life. And that is possible if the energy comes back. And it can be brought back from everywhere; there is no problem in it, you just have to practice the secret. And once you have got the knack of it, you will find it everywhere.
Looking at a green tree, you can be so alive – as if the whole sap of the tree has flown toward you, the whole juice of the tree has gone into your being. Looking at the moon, and you will be surprised: there is no need to get drunk with any alcohol or any other drug, with the moon you can become a drunkard. The moon can return so much energy if you know how to take it back.
In India, in the ancient Rig Veda, there is talk of soma. Scientists think that soma is something like LSD. Scientists think it must have been a kind of mushroom that has disappeared from the Himalayas because of the change in the climate or something. Or maybe it has not disappeared, maybe people have just forgotten about it. It may be still growing somewhere in the deep valleys of the Himalayas and we have simply forgotten what it is. Maybe the ancient seers knowingly helped humanity to forget about it; it may have proved too dangerous.
Aldous Huxley says that soma was the ultimate drug, and in the future when we have discovered the ultimate LSD, we will again call it soma. But you will be surprised to know that in Sanskrit soma is another name for moon. Hence, Monday in Hindi is called somwar, the day of the moon. Soma is another name for the moon. It is not a mushroom, it is not some kind of LSD, it is not a drug, it is a secret science of getting in communion with the moon. And just as the ocean is affected by the moon, if you can get the energy back from the moon, you will be surprised: great juice, great nectar showers on you. You can be drunk without getting drunk on any drug.
The moon can affect you to the very core of your being. And it will make you cool and calm because the moon is the feminine energy. Just as when you embrace a woman that you love and suddenly you feel great calm and quietude arising in you, exactly the same happens on a greater scale when energy returns to you from the moon.
The moon is the feminine principle, just as the sun is the masculine principle. The moon is yin; the sun is yang. The moon can mother you. There is no need to go in search to the Himalayan valleys for some mushroom, that mushroom is always there in the sky; it is the moon. You have to learn the secret of how to get energy back from the moon.
There have been secret methods to get energy from the moon and from the sun too. Sun worship was born out of a certain technique; great temples of the sun arose. The sun temple of Konarak was just an expression of gratitude to the sun. It was not just worship; it was a science – how to get yang energy in you. It is particularly good for women to get sun energy in them so that their hidden, dormant yang becomes active, and it is good for men to get moon energy so that their dormant feminine principle becomes alive, moving again. It is good for a woman to be a sun worshipper and good for a man to be a moon worshipper.
But the worship has not to be just a ritual, it has to be this method.
When the light is made to move in a circle, all the energies of heaven and earth, of the light and the dark, are crystalized.
Light and dark symbolize man/woman, light/heavy, grace/gravitation, life/death, movement/rest. All these things are represented by light and dark.
In short, if the energy can move in a circle, slowly, slowly you will not know who you are – whether a man or a woman. Extroversion is the principle of yang, introversion is the principle of yin. Man is naturally extrovert, woman is naturally introvert. Even while making love, man keeps his eyes open – he wants to see, he is a voyeur. Hence the possibility of pornography. No woman is interested in pornography – no woman sees any point in it. Even while making love to her beloved, she closes her eyes. She is an introvert, her energy moves inwardly.
But the energy has to become a circle, otherwise one remains a man, one remains a woman. And both are half, two halves of the same whole. Hence the attraction and the need for the other. The day you are able to circulate your energy in a circle you will not need another woman, you will not need another man, because your own man, your own woman will meet and merge into each other. You will be whole; and to be whole is to be holy.
This is Tao and this is Tantra too: to be whole is to be holy.
When the light is made to move in a circle, all the energies of heaven and earth, of the light and the dark, are crystalized.
This is what Carl Gustav Jung called “individuation,” crystallization. This is what George Gurdjieff used to call “the birth of the self” or “the soul.”
Ordinarily you are just fragments, ordinarily you are a crowd; you have many selves. You don’t have a single “I,” you have many “Is,” small “Is”, and all struggling and competing with each other to dominate. This is the misery of man: that he is many. How can you be at ease if you are many? One part says, “Do this,” another part says, “No,” and a third part says, “Do something else.”
Whichever you follow you will repent because the other parts which were not willing to go will create trouble. They will go on insisting that you are on the wrong path, that the other alternative would have been far better. “If you had followed me, you would have arrived by now. And look, you didn’t listen to me.” But if you had listened to that part, then the other parts would have taken revenge.
Man is never contented, he cannot be, because he is many. If you become one, contentment follows of its own accord. If you are many, discontent is natural. If you are many, you live in constant conflict. If you are one, conflict disappears; you have come home.
This is what Taoists call crystallization. And the method to achieve it is to make the light move in a circle so your yin and yang are no longer separate.
The light has to move just exactly as your breathing moves: in and out, out and in, you exhale, you inhale. Just think of a person who only exhales: he will not be able to live, his body will die. Or think of the person who only inhales: he will also die. And that’s exactly what has happened to your soul.
Your soul is dead because either you exhale light or you inhale light; you have not yet learned that exhalation and inhalation have to become a circle, one process. Exhale deeply and inhale deeply.
Just as breath is necessary for the life of the body, consciousness is necessary for the soul. So consciousness should not be left as a half, the circle should be completed. The woman has to learn how to be a man too, and the man has to learn how to be a woman too. And when the man and woman have come to an equal balance, when they are utterly balanced, that is crystallization, individuation; the soul is born.
When one begins to apply this magic . . .
And, yes, it is magic because its effects are really unbelievable.
When one begins to apply this magic it is as if, in the middle of being, there were nonbeing.
This is what I meant by “black hole.”
When one begins to apply this magic it is as if, in the middle of being, there were nonbeing.
As if you are surrounded by being, but you are an island of non-being, of nothingness – a black hole. The trees are alive, the stars are alive, the birds are alive, the Earth is alive, the sun and the moon are alive, everything is alive, and you . . . just a dead black hole. In this vast ocean of being you are a non-being. This is the situation when you begin.
When in the course of time the work is completed, and beyond the body there is a body, it is as if, in the middle of nonbeing there were being.
Then everything changes; then you become a being, a white hole. You become so integrated, so crystallized, that compared to you, all the suns and the moons and the trees and the birds and the animals look like non-being.
Just think of a buddha: he has being – the whole existence feels pale compared to him. He has life – life eternal, life abundant. The whole existence is poor, he is rich. He is an emperor; the whole existence is beggarly.
When in the course of time the work is completed, and beyond the body there is a body . . .
When this circle of light becomes stabilized in you, crystallized in you, you will start feeling another body within the body. This body is made of dust, that body is made of God, of divinity. This body has form, that body has no form. This body is gross, that body is subtle. This body will have to die, that body knows no death. This body is part of time, that body is part of eternity.
When this second body is born – and it can be born only when you have learned how to inhale and exhale light . . . Just as you are inhaling and exhaling breath, when you have learned how to inhale and exhale light – the second body, the body of light . . . This is the body of darkness, this is the body which is part of the Earth, part of gravitation. It is heavy, it is pulled downward. The other body is pulled upward, it is part of grace, it is light – light in both senses of the word – it is illumined and it is weightless. You can fly.
That’s what Zen people call “flying without wings.” Then the whole sky and the infinity of it is available to you.
. . . as if, in the middle of nonbeing, there were being. Only after concentrated work of a hundred days will the light be genuine.
In the beginning the light will look almost like imagination – in the beginning it has to be imagination. Only after a time, a hundred days, the
. . . concentrated work of a hundred days . . .
It depends on how concentrated your work is; a hundred days is not a fixed line. If your work is totally concentrated, then a hundred days, otherwise it will take a hundred years or a hundred lives, one knows not. It depends on the intensity. If your being is totally involved in it, committed to it, you are bent upon it, you are ready to risk all for it, then in one hundred days the light will become genuine. In the beginning it will be imagination.
Imagination is not wrong; imagination is wrong only when it takes you against reality, when it becomes a barrier. Imagination is not wrong when it cooperates with reality, then it is a great blessing. In the beginning you will feel it as imaginary – just looking in the mirror, you will feel, “This is all imagination, that the reflection is looking at me.” It is imagination in the beginning, but soon you will realize that it was not imagination, you were just turning the key in the lock of reality. It starts happening.
In the beginning, if you touch a tree with great love – you know the tree cannot respond – and if you feel some response from the tree, you will think it is imagination. It is not; the tree responds, but it will take a little time for you to recognize the truth of it. When you are loving, the tree responds with love – love is always responded to with love. And if love is not responded to with love, then know well your love is not love, that’s all; then something else is masquerading as love.
. . . then only will it become spirit-fire.
After a hundred days’ concentrated effort it will become spirit-fire.
After a hundred days there develops by itself in the midst of the light a point of the true light-pole.
First it is a diffused light; you just feel it very slightly there. Sometimes it is there and sometimes it is not there; it is very dim and very fragile. But slowly, slowly it becomes very centered. It becomes a light-pole.
Then suddenly there develops the seed-pearl.
Then, just at the very center of the light-pole, the seed-pearl.
It is as if a man and woman embraced and a conception took place.
And it is exactly so: the inner man and the inner woman have embraced. It is a kind of inner intercourse – it is real Tantra. Your feminine part and your masculine part are making love to each other, are joined together. And then there is no need for them to separate.
With the outer woman you will have to separate, otherwise it will become very ugly. With the outer woman you will have to separate, otherwise it will become repulsive. With the outer man you will have to separate; it can only be momentary – only for a moment can you have the glimpse of unity – but with the inner there is no need to separate.
A buddha lives in a constant orgasmic state: the inner woman and the inner man go on making love. You must have seen the shivalinga in Hindu temples; that is a symbol. Just below that linga is the yoni, the feminine part; it is a symbol of the inner man and woman meeting. It is not just phallic as Freudians will interpret it, it is symbolic; it symbolizes the inner polarity.
And once this meeting has happened, you are born anew. When Jesus says to Nicodemus, “Unless you are born again . . .” this is what he means. I don’t know what Christians say and I don’t care either, but this is what he means. “Unless you are born again . . .” This is the birth he means. And this is what Hindus call dwija, twice-born: you have given birth to yourself. If the outer man meets with the outer woman you create a child, you reproduce. If the inner man meets the inner woman you again create a child, but you are the parent and you are the child. A new life begins in you, the life of a buddha, the life of enlightenment, the life of deathlessness.
Then one must be quite still and wait . . .
When this conception has been felt inside, when you feel that the inner man has penetrated the inner woman and the woman is pregnant, then nothing is left but to wait. Just as the woman waits for nine months with great joy, with great prayer, with great hope, you wait. Nothing else has to be done – no need to do anything – the doing part is finished.
The male part is action. To make light circulate is the male part. Once the conception has taken place and the inner woman is pregnant, then the male part need not work, it has to rest. Then things grow on their own.
Meditation is the first part, then there is only prayer left. Hence I say to you that without meditation you will never know what prayer is. Prayer is the highest form of meditation. Prayer is like fragrance, meditation is like the flower. One has to go through meditation.
People ask me why, if their path is that of prayer, are they supposed to do so many meditations here in my ashram. Prayer will come; you have to pave the way for it to come. You have to go through all kinds of meditations – these are cleansing processes. This is the male part of you that has to be satisfied, and then the female part will take possession; you will be pregnant. And to be pregnant is to be prayerful because then nothing is left to be done. Effort is finished and now you are effortless. This is what Taoists call “inaction through action.”
You have been doing many experiments on moving the light in a circle, you have succeeded after a long, concentrated effort; something has crystallized in you – the man and woman are no more separate, they have become one – the child is there. Now, except for waiting, nothing is needed. Wait with hope, wait with trust. And this is what prayer is.
In the midst of the primal transformation, the radiance of the light is the determining thing.
And what will make you alert that the pregnancy has happened? You will start seeing an inner radiance. Whenever you close your eyes, you will not see darkness but radiance. And not only will you see it, those who love you – they will start seeing an aura around you.
In the midst of the primal transformation, the radiance of the light is the determining thing.
How do you know that a woman is pregnant? Have you not seen a certain aura around a pregnant woman? Have you not seen some light coming out of her eyes, her face, her very being? It is exactly the same, but on a much higher plane, when you are pregnant with God within you. You will see radiance. Whenever you close your eyes, you will be all light inside, a sourceless light, coming from nowhere, very cool light, moonlight, but immensely enchanting, magical. And others who love you and are very close to you will also start feeling it.
That’s why we draw an aura around the pictures of saints: it is not available to everybody. If you had seen Christ, you would not have seen his aura, but his disciples saw it. Certainly, the people who crucified him didn’t see that aura. They could not see; they were blind, they were closed. The aura was seen around Buddha – by the disciples. These secrets are available only to lovers. They are such intimate secrets that they are not available to all and sundry, to any Tom, Dick and Harry. They are only available to those who are intimate, those who come close, close, closer and closer, and those who are open, vulnerable.
In the midst of the primal transformation, the radiance of the light is the determining thing. In the physical world it is the sun; in man, the eye.
And when the inner radiance starts growing in you, the eyes become aflame, they look drunk. There is a dance in the eyes – a subtle light, a totally different quality comes to the eyes. Now the eyes not only see things, but they share too. Tao cannot be divided, but it can be shared. And the sharing of Tao is through the eyes.
When I initiate you into sannyas, I ask you to look at me. I want to look into your eyes, I want my eyes to dig deep into your eyes, to have a contact there, because behind your two eyes is hidden the third eye. If the third eye is contacted – and if you are open it happens within a split second, time is not needed – if the third eye is contacted, I know a disciple has come. If it is not contacted, then I only hope that you will become a disciple someday. In that hope I give you sannyas. But that is a hope; it may be fulfilled, it may not be fulfilled – it will depend on a thousand and one things. But when I see a disciple, when the third eye immediately starts responding to me, then you have come – to the place you have been seeking and searching for. Now there will be no need to go anywhere, now you will not need any Master, any teaching. You have come home.
This energy is directed outward – flows downward.
Ordinarily, the energy that is coming from the eyes flows outward. “Outward” and “downward” are synonymous.
Therefore the way of golden flower depends wholly on the backward-flowing method.
Ordinarily the energy is going outward and downward. You have to bring it backward, inward – and “inward” is synonymous with “upward.” Once it starts coming back to you and you become a circle of energy, you will be surprised: a new dimension has opened up; you start moving upward. Your life is no longer horizontal, it has taken a new route, the vertical.
God exists on the vertical route. You will not come across him in the world – not that he is not in the world, but unless you are moving vertically, you will not come across him. Just as a blind man cannot see light, the horizontal man cannot see God.
Many come to me and say, “If you show us God, we will believe.” But how can I show you God? How can I show a blind man light unless he is prepared to go through the treatment so that his eyes open? I will have to turn you from your horizontal way of life into a vertical way of life. That’s what sannyas is all about: a vertical way of being. And once the light starts moving upward, the golden flower opens up.
These are symbols; there is no flower inside you. “Flower” simply represents flowering, “golden” simply represents its lightfulness, its radiance.
The circulation of the light is not only a fantasy.
Remember: the circulation of the light is not only a fantasy. In the beginning it may appear so – you will have to be patient – soon it becomes a fact. It is a fact, it is a fact from the very beginning, but just because you have never been in contact with it, in the beginning it looks like a fantasy.
By concentrating the thoughts, one can fly; by concentrating the desires, one falls.
Desire is the Taoist name for energy moving downward, “outward,” and “thought” is the Taoist symbol for energy moving inward. So don’t misunderstand. By “thought,” Taoists don’t mean your so-called thoughts, by “thought” they mean thought-energy purified of desire. If it is purified of desire and all desire has disappeared, then there is no need to go out because you go out only because you are desirous of something. You desire a house, you desire money, you desire power, you desire a man, a woman, this and that, then you go out. If there is no desire, thought need not go out; it starts turning inward – the one-hundred-and-eighty-degree turn happens.
Desireless thought is inward-moving, desireful thought is outward-moving. Hence the insistence of all the buddhas on desirelessness.
When a pupil takes little care of his thoughts and much care of his desires, he gets into the path of submersion.
When a disciple takes little care of his thought and too much care of his desires he is drowned in the world.
Only through contemplation and quietness does true intuition arise: for that the backward-flowing method is necessary.
Thought has to be purified of desire. Once thought is purified of desire it is no-thought. Mind without desires is a no-mind. It is what Patanjali calls samadhi, Zen people call satori, Taoists call crystallization: the balance of the outward and the inward. And no energy is lost; it goes into the world and comes back, like a bird flying in the morning out into the sky, and by the evening it comes back to the nest.
Let your energy come back to the nest again and again. Don’t let it go forever without turning it back to you. And you will become a reservoir, and you will become tremendously powerful inwardly. Only in that power does intuition start functioning. In that power spirit-fire is born. In that power the true light-pole arises. In that power suddenly there develops the seed-pearl.
It is as if a man and woman embraced and a conception took place. Then one must be quite still and wait.
Meditation is complete and prayer begins. To bring meditation to prayer is the whole work of Tao.
Enough for today.
-Osho
From The Secret of Secrets, Discourse #7
Copyright © OSHO International Foundation
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