Focused “I Am” Meditation – Nisargadatta Maharaj

Focused I amMeditation

1. The ‘I am’ came first, it’s ever present, ever available, refuse all thoughts except ‘I am’, stay there.

2. Just stay put firmly and establish yourself in the ‘I am’, reject all that does not go with ‘I am’

3. Consistently and with perseverance separate the ‘I am’ from ‘this’ or ‘that’, just keep in mind the feeling ‘I am’

4. Only the ‘I am’ is certain, it’s impersonal, all knowledge stems from it, it’s the root, hold on to it and let all else go.

5. You are sure of the ‘I am’, it’s the totality of being, remember ‘I am’ and it’s enough to heal your mind and take you beyond.

6. The ‘I am’ is, it’s ever fresh, all else is inference, when the ‘I am’ goes all that remains is the Absolute.

7. Give all your attention to the ‘I am’, which is timeless presence, the ‘I am’ applies to all, come back to it repeatedly.

8. Hang on to the ‘I am’ and go beyond it, without the ‘I am’ you are at peace and happy.

9. Hold on to the ‘I am’ to the exclusion of everything else, the ‘I am’ in movement creates the world, the ‘I am’ at peace becomes the Absolute.

10. Immortality is freedom from the feeling ‘I am’, to have that freedom remain in the sense ‘I am’, it’s simple, it’s crude, yet it works!

11. The ‘I am’ is unreal and real, unreal when identified with body, real when wordless and used to go beyond.

12. The ‘I am’ has brought you in, the ‘I am’ will take you out, the ‘I am’ is the door, stay at it! It’s open!

13. You have to be there before you can say ‘I am’, the ‘I am’ is the root of all appearance.

14. The ‘I am’ is the permanent link in the succession of events called life, be at the link ‘I am’ only and go beyond it.

15. The ‘I am’ is the sum total of all that you perceive, it’s time‐bound, the ‘I am’ itself is an illusion, you are not the ‘I am’ you are prior to it.

16. The ‘I am’ is your greatest foe and greatest friend, foe when binding to the illusion as body, friend when taking out of the illusion as body.

17. The beginning and the end of knowledge is the ‘I am’, be attentive to the ‘I am’, once you understand it, you are apart from it.

18. You must meditate on the ‘I am’ without holding on to the body‐mind, the ‘I am’ is the first ignorance, persist on it and you will go beyond it.

19. Your Guru, your God, is the ‘I am’, with its coming came duality and all activity, stay on the ‘I am’, you are before the ‘I am’ appeared.

20. The ‘I am’ concept is the last outpost of the illusion, hold on to it, stabilize in the ‘I am’, then you are no more an individual.

21. Without doing anything you have the knowledge ‘I am’, it has come spontaneously and unwillingly on you, stay there and put an axe to the ‘I am’.

22. Your only capital is the ‘I am’, it’s the only tool you can use to solve the riddle of life, the ‘I am’ is in all and movement inherent in it.

23. Only be the ‘I am’, just be, the ‘I am’ has appeared on your homogeneous state, the one free of the ‘I am’ is liberated, you are prior to the ‘I am’.

24. Worship the indwelling ‘I am’ in you, it is the ‘I am’ that is born, it is the ‘I am’ that will die, you are not that ‘I am’.

25. Remain focused on the ‘I am’ till it goes into oblivion, then the eternal is, Absolute is, Parabrahman is.

26. The knowledge ‘I am’ is the birth principle, investigate it and you’ll finally stabilize in the Absolute Parabrahman.

27. All knowledge including the ‘I am’ is formless, throw out the ‘I am’ and stay put in quietude

28. Prior to birth where was the ‘I am’? Don’t contaminate the ‘I am’ with the body idea, I as the Absolute am not the ‘I am’

29. In the absence of ‘I am’ nothing is required, the ‘I am’ will go with the body, what remains is the Absolute.

30. You must not only have the conviction that ‘I am’ but also that you are free from the ‘I am’.

31. Remember the knowledge ‘I am’ only and give up the rest, staying in the ‘I am’ you would realize that it is unreal.

32. Understand that the knowledge ‘I am’ has dawned on you and all are its manifestations, in this understanding you realize you are not the ‘I am’.

33. When this concept ‘I am’ departs there would be no memory left that ‘I was’ and ‘I had’ those experiences, the very memory will be erased.

34. With the arrival of the primary concept ‘I am’, time began, with its departure time would end, you the Absolute are not the primary concept ‘I am.

35. When you know both the ‘I am’ and the ‘I am not’ then you are the Absolute which transcends both knowingness and no‐knowingness.

36. Appearance and disappearance, birth and death these are qualities of ‘I am’, they do not belong to you, the Absolute.

37. Out of the nothingness, the ‘I am ‘ or beingness has come, there is no individual, the knowledge ‘I am’‐ not the individual – has to go back to its source.

38. By meditating on the knowledge ‘I am’ it gradually settles down at its source and disappears, then, you are the Absolute.

39. Go on to know the ‘I am’ without words, you must be that and not deviate from it for even a moment, and then it would disappear.

40. With the dropping off of the primary experience ‘I am’ all experiences would vanish and only the Absolute remains.

41. On your true state has arisen this subtle principle ‘I am’, which is the cause of all mischief, no ‘I am’, and no question of mischief.

42. Whatever you try to become that is not you, before even the words ‘I am’ were said, that is you.

43. The root habit is the ‘I am’ and it has arisen from the domain five elements and three qualities which are unreal.

44. Abide in the knowledge ‘I am’ without identifying with the body, how did you function before the arrival of the knowledge ‘I am’?

45. The state of being, that is the message ‘I am’, without words, is common to all, change begins only with the mind‐flow.

46. The belief in the ‘I am’ to be something as a body, as an individual is the cause of all fear, in the absence of the ‘I am’, who is to fear what?

47. Try to stabilize in the primary concept ‘I am’ in order to lose that and be free from all other concepts, in understating the unreality of the ‘I am’ you are totally free.

48. Sitting quietly, being one with the knowledge ‘I am’, you would lose all concern with the world, then the ‘I am’ would also go, leaving you as the Absolute.

49. Putting aside everything, stabilize in the ‘I am’ ‐ as you continue with this practice – in the process you will transcend the ‘I am’.

50. The very core of this consciousness is the quality ‘I am’, there is no personality or individual there, reside there and transcend it.

51. Worship the knowledge ‘I am’ as God, as your Guru, the message ‘I am’ is there, the mind‐flow is there, stay in the ‘I am’ realize you are neither.

52. Presently you are sustaining the memory ‘I am’, you are not that ‘I am’, you are the Absolute, prior to that ‘I am’.

53. You feel the ‘I am’ due to the five elements and three qualities, when they go the ‘I am’ goes but you are still there.

54. Keep focused on the ‘I am’ till you become a witness to it, then you stand apart, you have reached the highest.

55. This knowledge ‘I am’ has come out of the state prior to it and now is the cause of all suffering, before the ‘I am’ came you were happy, so revert.

56. When you remain in the ‘I am’ you will realize everything else is useless, then you are Parabrahman, the Absolute.

57. One who abides in that principle by which he knows ‘I am’, then he knows all and does not require anything.

58. Just sit and know that ‘you are’, the ‘I am’ without words, nothing else has to be done, shortly you will arrive to your natural Absolute state.

59. Erroneously you have handed over this knowledge’ I am’ to the body thereby reduced the limitless to the limited, hence you are afraid of dying.

60. You have to realize that you are not the body nor the knowledge ‘I am’, you as the Absolute are neither nor do you require them.

61. Inquire into the validity of the fundamental concept of your individuality the ‘I am’ and it will disappear, then you are Parabrahman, the Absolute.

62. The essential thing to be convinced about is that the original concept ‘I am’ is false, only accept that which is conducive to this development.

63. Before you occurred to yourself as ‘I am’ you were the highest ‐ Parabrahman – now, until the impurity of ‘I am the body’ goes stay put in the ‘I am’ quietude.

64. Your fall started with the appearance of ‘I am’, then you blundered by embracing the body as ‘I am’, all that gathered thereafter is unreal.

65. This is no joke, but you can become Parabrahman right now! You are Parabrahman right now! Just focus your attention on the ‘I am’.

66.Who has the knowledge ‘I am’? Somebody in you knows the knowledge ‘I am’, ‘you are’, who is it?

67. Who can know the illusory state ‘I am’? Only a non‐illusory state can do so, it’s the Awareness, the Parabrahman, the Absolute.

68. The primary concept ‘I am’ is dishonest, a cheat, it has deceived you, into believing what is not, sharply focus on the ‘I am’ and it’ll disappear.

69. Finally you have to transcend the ‘I am’ to enter the concept‐free Parabrahman state, where you do not even know you are!

70. The Absolute or the Parabrahman is prior to the ‘I am’, it’s the unborn state, so how can it have the knowledge ‘I am’?

71. Presently whatever you know is the ‘I am’ which is a product of the five elements, three qualities or the food body, but you are none of these.

72. One who has realized the knowledge ‘I am’ which means transcending it as well, for him there is no birth or death nor any karma.

73. The primary illusion is only this knowingness ‘I am’; it is liberation when the knowingness is transformed to non‐knowingness.

74. You are even before even you could say the words ‘I am’, witnessing happens to the state prior to your saying the words ‘I am’.

75. When the body dies the ‘I am’ goes into oblivion, only the Absolute remains, stay put there, nothing happens to you the Absolute.

76. From non‐being to being, how is it known? It’s by the knowledge ‘I am’, stay there in the ‘I am’, then you’ll revert from being to non‐being.

77. Right now, here, you are the Absolute, the Parabrahman, very firmly hold on to the ‘I am’, ever abide in it and it’ll dissolve, then you are as you are.

78. On the state of non‐beingness, beingness as the ‘I am’ has occurred, who is that is not important, the ‘I am’ is important, stay there.

79. First came the ‘aham’ as ‘I am’, then ‘aham‐akar’ (identification with body, ego), now revert back to ‘aham’, dwelling there realize ‘aham‐brahmasmi’

80. You are neither the ‘I am’ nor the activities carried out by the beingness, you as the Absolute are none of these.

81. With the transcendence of the knowledge ‘I am’, the Absolute prevails. The state is called Parabrahman, while the knowledge ‘I am’ is Brahman.

82. How were you prior to the message ‘I am’? In the absence of the message ‘I am’ only my eternal Absolute state prevails.

83. Who would have witnessed the message ‘I am’, if your prior state of non‐beingness were not there?

84. A true devotee, by abiding in the knowledge ‘I am’, transcends the experience of death and attains immortality.

85. Hold on to this knowingness ‘I am’ without words and every secret of your existence would be revealed to you.

86. What is it in you that understands this knowledge ‘I am’ without a name, title or word? Subside in that innermost center and witness the knowledge ‘I am’.

87. Totally accept the knowledge ‘I am’ as oneself and with full conviction and faith and firmly believe in the dictum ‘I am that by which I know I am’.

88. Reality prevails prior to the knowledge ‘I am’; you must stay put at the source of your creation, at the beginning of the knowledge ‘I am’.

89. When one is established in the final free Absolute state, the knowledge ‘I am’ becomes ‘non‐knowledge’.

90. The first witnessing is that of ‘I am’, the primary prerequisite for all further witnessing, but to whom is the first witnessing of ‘I am’ occurring?

91. The borderline of ‘I am’ (beingness) and ‘I am not’ (non‐beingness} is the precise location where the intellect subsides, its’ the ‘maha‐yoga’ state, be there.

92. Recognize the Atman by understanding the knowledge ‘I am’, the Atma‐jnana, which is all pervading, limitless and infinite.

93. To abide in the knowledge ‘I am’ is one’s true religion, give the highest honor due to it, doing so you will not undergo suffering or death.

94. Who says ‘I was not’ and ‘I would not be’ like the present ‘I am’? He is the one who was, is, and would be forever.

95. When you say ‘I was not prior to conception’ you actually mean not like the present ‘I am’, but the one to discern the absence of the present ‘I am’ was there.

96. Catch hold of the knowledge ‘I am’ in meditation and the realization would occur that ‘I ‘ the Absolute am not the ‘guna’ ‘I am’.

97. Do nothing but stay in the knowledge ‘I am’ – the ‘moolmaya’ – the primary illusion, then it will release its stranglehold on you and get lost.

98. In deep meditation, infused only with the knowledge ‘I am’, it would be intuitively revealed to you as to how this ‘I amness’ came to be.

99. The knowledge ‘I am’ means consciousness, God, Guru, Ishwara, but you the Absolute are none of these.

100. There is no ‘I am’ anymore, It’s the Parabrahman only…

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Unborn Children – Nisargadatta Maharaj

11th December 1979

Maharaj:

In sleep consciousness is dormant, when you get up consciousness says, ‘I had a good sleep’. You can give it any name you like –body, mind but it is an attribute that was dormant in sleep, it is not the senses telling you. The food-body will always have desires; beingness is the fragrance of the same body. Prior to it I did not know myself; it was an experience less state, suddenly the eight clues (five elements and three gunas) of experience and knowingness were fed lots of information – birth, body and so forth, with all this I started suffering. My Guru initiated me into an inquiry about myself. Did I experience my birth and parents? I hadn’t, so I rejected it. In the process I started investigating my own beingness; it was a temporary state, so I have disposed it off. I am free from fear now as I know this state will go. I have no fear of my beingness because I will experience the same (the going of beingness). Because of concepts I considered myself a personality and due to this conceptual state my true state suffered.

Just as I admonish you, I listen to my friends, their thoughts talk to me, even visions appear, I tell them to shut up. I admonish thoughts and visions. Will anybody quarrel with his thoughts? When these foreign or alien thoughts are kept aside, the Self starts sprouting and imparting knowledge. Then it is the realized principle that prevails which was never created, but behaves as though created. Who observes or witnesses then? ‘I the Absolute’ If there are no thoughts then there is no fear, and then the Self sprouts.

In the absence of beingness, what have I been doing? My unborn children, what are they doing? The same that I did prior to the appearance of this beingness. World, mind and all are expansive, how did this calamity occur- with the arrival of beingness? So I must investigate the cause of the trouble that is, beingness. Think how you came into this body complex instead of investigating the world.

The body falls down but what happened to me? For that principle for which you get no reply, is perfect, whatever answer you get is wrong. If I think of this world, why should I not inquire about prior to consciousness? If I tackle this question, I must investigate what is this principle of ‘I am’? I would prefer to play with that child not born because eternal Parabrahman and unborn children are alike.

You want to have knowledge. What do you mean by that? Hold on to that principle which  understands, recognizes thoughts, and then be quiet. For your sake, what are you? Investigate that. Forget who is torturing whom; stabilize in your most confidential being as ‘you are’. What are you?

Investigate the problems of manifest world can be solved later. There is no right answer to ‘who are you?’ no answer is the most correct one; any reply you get is not eternal. That eternal, unborn principle is now talking which has been accused of birth. ‘I feel I am guilty’. Whatever guilt you accept you have to suffer. In a country not visited a robbery occurs, the Police arrest you here. If you accept, you suffer, maybe a life term. I don’t accept the charge; I have not visited that place. I am not a robber. I plead that – ‘my only guilt is that I accept that I am born’. Give it up! I was not born on my own with my knowledge; I had no knowledge of my beingness. The Absolute has no scope, it’s unborn. Prior to my appearance ( beingness) it never occurred to me that I was, so where is the scope for feeling guilty either? If you had wisdom, you would reject beingness. No body means no knowingness, no consciousness, in the original state the five elements and the three gunas are not there.

The one, who assimilates what I say now, has no reason to be unhappy. The world is full of emotional unhappiness. A worm spawns out of decomposed food. I am not that worm, although made of food, beingness is a product of food.

In order to realize the Self, catch hold of the knowledge that ‘you are’. Do so at the feet of your Guru- your beingness means ‘Iswara’ that is Guru too, that is the Self. Feet means ‘charan’, char – to move- that gives you movement, that principle [beingness] starts movement. The merging of the individual with the universal comes to be by Sadhana (practice).

The five senses of action and five senses of knowledge do they act on their own? The five elements give rise to the five senses of knowledge. For manifestation, eight of them – the five elements and three gunas produce the essence. The Sattva guna produces the manifest world of forms, the knowledge that ‘I am’ is simultaneously created. What is created is the knowledge of existence; the individual assumes that this knowledge belongs to him. There is individual existence in this room. But the whole manifest world is Ishwara, Ishwara is like a city, He is there. As you believe that you are an individual, you die, the difference is that the individual dies while Ishwara, the entire manifestation, does not die; it has no limitations like those of the individual.

I am experiencing the manifest world but prior to it I experience the ‘Bindu’, the point. When I am that Bindu, everything is, the world also is. The Bindu and the world are not two. ‘Bin’ means without and ‘du’ means two, so, no duality. Bindu – the point of ‘I amness’, I experience that. What is it? It is the very experience of the five elements and the three gunas – the whole universe. That is my intimate relationship with that ‘I am’ only –Bindu only.

You go on pilgrimages so that good should happen to you as an individual. But you are not an individual, you are the manifest world. That ‘you are’ means the entire world, whatever manifestation you enjoy is universal. This knowledge is for the few rare ones, but instead of that manifestation ‘you are’, you hang on to individuality.

Whatever is observed in the manifest world is your own Self, The observer is ‘I am’.  It is a receptacle of the five elements and three gunas. The entire universe is in activity because of the three gunas. The play of the entire world is based on the five elements and three gunas. But you cling to your body; the body is also a play of the five elements and three gunas. The whole universe is in full play, it is like urination. You are one drop if you consider yourself to be an individual. A drop of ocean is salty and the salty taste is the knowledge ‘I am’. Suppose that drop dries, the ocean does not care – a drop of ocean drying on the rock. Similarly in the five elemental play you are a drop, either survive or die, the elemental ocean is unconcerned. But how to understand this manifest nature? Be the taste, understand the taste. Millions of drops dry up but the ocean is unconcerned. Millions die but how the five elements are concerned?

Because you limit yourself to the body, you suffer. The realized one can entertain no idea of good to himself, for him even if the entire world is destroyed, nothing happens. The realized one is, of course, no more a person. There is nothing else except the core of your Self –Bindu, nothing else is. Only Krishna said there is nothing else. You meditate incessantly to achieve Samadhi but this knowledge will sprout from you only. Since I am prior to that (consciousness) I talked of Bindu.

Now what happens to consciousness, when you are prior to it? In the waking state, how do you find out as though you are asleep? What do you do in deep sleep?

Visitor: Just be.

M: Do you enjoy that ‘just be’?

V: No.

M: Your beingness is not enjoying being is deep sleep. Are you aware of being male or female in deep sleep? Find out what you are, you know ‘you are’, find out, then, whatever are its requirements you will know. The subtle food essence is life; Subtler still is the quality of knowingness. The knowledge ‘you are’ is like a particle of the sky, it is more subtle than space, and it can recognize space.

V: What connection has it with life?

M: The whole life is endured and sustained by the knowledge particle, ‘I am’. Without ‘I am’ there is no life. They are interdependent, not one without the other. I am prior to the ‘I am’, which is true, eternal and immutable. Beingness, world and body are time bound, your life is not forever, it rises and sets like the waking and sleeping states alternate. The totality of manifestation thrives as long as the beingness is there. Rainwater has no taste, but out of it you get so much, you add ingredients to it and drink. I give you pure food but you find it tasteless so you pollute it, you add salt to the food for taste’s sake.

-Nisargadatta Maharaj

Taken from I Am Unborn, Chapter 6

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