Tears gently falling in rivers down my face… Just so tired of trying, struggling, fighting to be what I think I should be in order to get what I think I need. Beloved, even with you I tried so hard. In this giving up… The gap, the beauty, the unknown… Fears meet trust. Osho, could it be that this river is flowing towards life, towards you, towards the ocean?
Do you see? “Tears gently falling in rivers down my face… just so tired of trying, struggling, fighting to be what I think I should be in order to get what I think I need. Beloved, even with you I tried so hard.” This is the way of the will. It simply goes on destroying you. […]
You are feeling tired, full of tears. You have been struggling hard to be what you think you should be in order to get what you think you need. These are the ways of the will: you have to become this, you have to become that, you have to get this, you have to get that. But you are fortunate, greatly blessed that you became tired and you gave up trying; you gave up the will to succeed; you dropped the hardship you were imposing upon yourself.
“In this giving up… the gap,” – no will, no way, no you, just the gap. And, “the beauty, the unknown… fears meet trust. Osho, could it be that this river is flowing towards life, towards you, towards the ocean?” Deva Leena, there is no question, because every river is moving towards the ocean. It is only the man who gets frozen, and then the flow stops…. If you melt in trust, the river starts flowing again. And it has never been the case that any river has forgotten the path and has not reached the ocean.
But remember the gap. And remember Chuang Tzu’s statement, “Easy is right and right is easy.”
And when you forget both, what is right and what is easy, you have arrived at the ocean.
The ocean is not far away, Leena. But your ego is a frozen block – it needs melting. Love melts it, fear makes it more frozen, trust melts it. All that the people who are trying to find themselves have to do, is remain melted and allow the river to move on its own. You should not be the guide; the river needs no guide. Its very nature is to reach to the ocean. It is not an effort, it is its intrinsic quality.
After making the flight information, the Israeli pilot on the El Al jet forgot to turn the intercom off, and his next words were heard throughout the cabin, ”I will have a cup of coffee and then I will screw that gorgeous new stewardess, Lee.”
Lee was down at the end of the passenger cabin and ran forward to tell the pilot to turn the intercom off. Halfway down, an old man tripped her up.
“Can’t you wait, Lee? Let him have his coffee first!”
Leena, be at ease, have your coffee. And there is no need to run towards the ocean. Just slowly enjoy the trees, and the birds, and the people, having a trust in your heart that every river has always reached the ocean. And you cannot be the exception; existence does not allow any exceptions. You will also reach the ocean.
From The Razor’s Edge, Chapter 18
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